Greetings from Albuquerque

I’m here. I made it. Months of contemplation and weeks of planning have led me here to my new home in Albuquerque. It took me a long time to admit to myself that my life was not going to go back to the way it was. I needed to realize that for myself. It didn’t matter what advice I was given or how certain others felt about my situation. I had to move on and I had to do it someplace else and I had to come to that realization in my own time. I moved to California with certain intentions which no longer existed. It was time to make a new life for myself on my terms.

I’ve had some tough days during the past year and the day I left my house was certainly one of the toughest. I walked out of an empty house thinking about all the plans I had made for it when I moved in during the Summer of 2009. I had no idea that all those plans would be blown away on a chilly December night only six months later. What was once a warm and inviting home for me to raise my daughter had become a place of lies and broken promises and humiliation. I didn’t want to live there anymore knowing all the secrets that were shared behind my back.

So, it’s time for me to put the past behind me and move forward. I have a wonderful, caring family who have helped me settle in to my new surroundings with ease. I have a good job with friendly, helpful people who have welcomed me warmly. I found a great daycare for my daughter and she seems to be settling in nicely. My parents were right there for me and Sidney through packing, moving, traveling, unpacking and settling in. I hope they know how much I appreciate all they did for me.

I am hopeful about my future and my daughter’s future. I am certain I made the right decision to move here and I haven’t regretted it for a moment. I look forward to meeting new people and finding good restaurants and buying a house and taking Sidney to new places. I’ve got a list of road trips I want to take with her when she’s old enough to enjoy them.

I know I still have some healing to do and some anger and sadness to deal with, but I have a lot of dark days already behind me. I can look back and realize how far I’ve come in my healing over the past year, and be proud of myself.